Dear Baby Pacheco,
You are a little over 11 weeks now… the size of a lime. A lime. It really blows my mind that there is a lime-sized baby in my belly (and I think my uterus is almost the size of a grapefruit at this point), yet I look more or less like my normal self. Honestly even though I know it’s normal, I still can’t help but wonder and worry about whether you’re doing okay in there. Last week I had a regular checkup, and was pretty surprised at how little they did. The nurse took a urine sample & checked my blood pressure, then the doctor came in and talked about some optional tests they could do to check for genetic issues such as Down’s syndrome, and tried to hear your heartbeat on the doppler… unfortunately it was too soon to really hear your heartbeat over my own on that little doppler. She said that is totally normal for so early (I was closer to 10 weeks at that point), but I would’ve felt much better if we’d been able to hear it.
After the discussion with the doctor and haggling with our insurance company, we decided to go with the non-invasive nuchal translucency (NT) scan, a combination of ultrasound and blood test that is 90% effective in revealing potential genetic issues. Mostly we just wanted an extra chance to get to see you again! 🙂 This test must be done between 11-13 weeks, so I scheduled it for Monday July 16 (just over 12 weeks)… Dad and I CAN’T WAIT to see you again, and see how much you’ve grown and changed since our last glimpse of you during week 7!
Speaking of Dad, he had expressed some interest to me early on about wanting to contribute to this blog somehow… but he is, as he puts it, “not so good with words.” LOL. So I came up with the idea of interviewing him so that he could tell me his thoughts/feelings/etc. and I could more eloquently get them down for you. Here goes! The questions are written from my perspective in the conversation with him, obviously.
1. What was the first thing to run through your head when you found out I was pregnant?
Dad says he was extremely excited. I asked him if he was surprised that we were able to get pregnant after only two cycles of trying, and he said “Of course not. My sperm is strong!” HAHAHAHAHA. What a typical man thing to say! 😉
2. How has expecting a baby changed your life so far, if at all?
Dad said that the first week or so, he felt the need to be more cautious at work… his job is very physical and can sometimes be a little dangerous. However, he says that feeling faded pretty quickly. Now his sole concern is my safety (and in turn, your safety): he worries a lot about me carrying things, falling down, and the dogs jumping on my belly. I can vouch for this- I remember one time earlier on he got on me for picking up a notebook. I said “seriously?!” Also I asked him whether he worries a lot about something going wrong with the pregnancy, and he said that he tries not to think too much about it… but, as he said, “Mommy is worrying a lot and that makes me worry too. It’s a vicious cycle.” He also said he’s been trying to get in better shape, so that he’ll have an easier time playing with you and chasing you around!
3. What was it like being in the hospital the night of the bleeding incident?
Absolutely terrifying… Dad said he felt so helpless. He added that the worst part was when that crazy ER doctor gave us the option to end the pregnancy since there wasn’t “a viable heartbeat.” Boy did that lady turn out to be wrong! But I agree, that part really made me mad too.
4. How did you feel when you saw the baby on the ultrasound for the first time? The second time?
Dad said it was such a thrill! After what we’d gone through in the ER there was also a huge sense of relief. He was really happy to finally get to see you in there, and it made the pregnancy seem much more real to him. The second ultrasound was a similar experience, and it was also interesting to see how you had changed over the week. Dad was so relieved that you were growing as expected.
5. What are you most looking forward to about being a dad?
Dad says he is really looking forward to teaching you things and sharing our life with you. (His first word when I asked this was actually “science!” Haha) I asked if he had any insecurities about his ability to be a father, and he said he hadn’t really given that much thought. He said in general he’s confident that we’ll be great parents. But his overall approach (with this and, I’ve found, with life) is to adopt a “wait and see” philosophy… to deal with the changes and learning curve of becoming parents as best as he can, and address issues as they arise.
6. If you could say anything to the baby right now, what would you say?
“Hang in there, kid.” 😉 We both love you so much and can’t wait to meet you!
That’s about all for now. I will probably wait to post again until after our NT scan so that I’ll be able to tell you all about it right away, share pictures of the ultrasound and finally get around to starting some belly photos (not that there’s anything to see at this point, but I’m hoping I’ll be glad I did them someday). Until then… as Dad put it– hang in there, kid!
All my love,